The Title (I don't know what else to put at this moment).

I was talking to my Dad on FaceTime tonight and I was telling him that I haven't been able to return to the blog since my last post.  Anything I think to write seems so insignificant in the grand scheme of things.  How can I possibly start talking about arts and crafts and cooking and packing and new toys and tv shows after all that has happened?  It just seems strange to me.  But I suppose that's what people do.  They move on.  And I know Shani would be incredibly embarrassed (and upset!) to know how many tears we've all shed thinking about her and her family.  She would be MORTIFIED actually, screaming "MISS!!!!" and "SIR!!!!!!" in that wonderful, high-pitched voice of hers.  It makes me laugh just thinking about it.  So, Shani.......here goes nothing.  I'm back!

I really do think she has a knack for photography.  I'm convinced it's in the genes ;)

Things have been busy around the house.  Nory is a full-fledged NORNADO most of the time.  She can do a real number on a room in the time span of......30 seconds?  It's a talent, I swear!  Her current favourite things include climbing (everything!), slamming doors, taking the lid off the garbage can, and playing with the salad spinner.  She's started to say "BOBO" in reference to a certain monkey in one of her books and two days ago we taught her where to find her ears.  Our goal is to teach her other body parts this week, although I've been dodging the whole "where is your nose?" lesson in response to a nose-picking, attention-seeking behaviour she does to drive me nuts.  (It was discovered following the last cold she had, and she knows I will chase her down and pull that finger away if I catch her doing it!  Sometimes All the time, this turns into a fast-paced game of tag.  Which she seems to enjoy.  Hmmmm.....perhaps I should consider an alternative parenting method....)

Boxes were dropped off this afternoon for packing up the flat (boo), but I have already decided that the biggest one will be used for playhouse-building rather than packing (yay!).  With some markers, glitter crayons, and stickers - that boring white box will be transformed into one happening abode!  Hey - gotta keep Girlie occupied with SOMETHING as we sort out our life as honest-to-goodness HOARDERS.  Isn't a crafting hay day the best possible solution?

We've been doing many other crafts around the house lately.  I will post pictures in the next couple of days.  Have I told you how much I LOVE being a Mom?  Because I LOVE IT.  Which reminds me, Mother's Day also happened in the last week and I should post some pictures of that too :)

Tonight I'm spent.  It's time to relax with Phil and cross my fingers that our teething babe doesn't do a repeat of last night.  Ah-hem......wake up RANDOMLY for 2.5 hours in the middle of the night.

Cross your fingers too, will ya?!
XOXO

An Angel Somewhere Else.

Sri Lanka - a little piece of heaven in the Indian Ocean.

In the cold, tear-filled halls of the ICU, I looked through the window at our beautiful Shani and told her how much we loved her.  I told her that she didn't have to look after anybody anymore.  That it was time to look after herself - even if that meant letting go.....

This afternoon she did just that.  She let go.  And she became, I'm certain, the most beautiful angel to ever grace heaven.

Shani, we love you so very much.  Please take time for a cup of tea up there.  There's plenty of time for sweeping the clouds and polishing halos.....

You are forever in our hearts.
XOXO  

Shani

Shani, holding Nory, with Kumari at her side.

I'm not really sure how to start this post.  I've sat here staring at the blank screen for several minutes, wondering what I want to say, what I need to say, and how I should say it.  It might not come out as eloquently as I would like, but perhaps in writing it I will feel a sense of peace.

Yesterday after school, Emily called me with some terrible news.  Someone we have grown to love so deeply, our cleaning lady Shani, had been rushed to the hospital and was in critical condition.

My heart sank.  I burst into tears.  How could this be?

Shani has worked for us ever since we arrived in Kuwait four years ago.  I remember her stopping me in the stairwell one day at school, asking if she could clean our house for some extra money.  She was shy to inquire but I could tell she needed our help and so I asked her how much she charged for her services.  She shrugged and said "anything Miss, you choose."  Later that day, I  remember speaking with Phil about bringing this stranger into our home, knowing in advance his reluctance for hiring a maid.  He's the type that enjoys doing housework himself, but he is also the type that proceeds with caution when it comes to trusting others.  Ultimately, he agreed to having her come "once a week" and our relationship with Shani began.

Shani started coming to our house every Tuesday for three, four, five hours at a time.  She mopped the floors, dusted every nook and cranny, cleaned the bathrooms, and polished other odd places that we wouldn't even THINK to clean ourselves.  She ironed my clothes, fluffed the pillows, folded my underwear (who does that?!) and even went so far as to remove the hair from my hairbrush (how embarrassing!).  She was SUPER WOMAN 2.0 and the way she scurried around the house like the energizer bunny left us absolutely astonished.  We began to recommend her to friends that were also looking for a maid and, since Shani was interested in securing some more "part time work", arrangements were quickly made for her to clean for others.  It wasn't long before she was working full days at our school (as a maid near my science classroom) and leaving from school to work full nights at the homes of our friends and colleagues.  The lady was go-go-go ALL THE TIME and didn't give herself a single day - or even afternoon - off.

As we got more familiar with Shani, we weren't as quick to leave the room when she came over.  Initially it was a strange situation (you know, having someone you don't know - who speaks little English - tidy up your household messes!), but the awkwardness diminished and we started to chat for a few minutes here and there as she went about the cleaning.  I slowly learned that she had three children living with her parents in Sri Lanka.  That her husband was also in Kuwait, working at a nearby hotel.  And that the money they earned together was sent home to Sri Lanka for their children to receive the best education possible.  They made the ultimate sacrifice of moving away from their family - to work in an environment that is not always incredibly friendly - to give their three children the opportunity for a better life.  Now that I am a parent, I appreciate this sacrifice even more.

Our relationship continued to grow and Shani began to surprise us on weekends with yummy Sri Lankan food.  She knew that Phil didn't like his food too spicy, but that I liked mine extra spicy.  She knew that I was a border-line vegetarian, but that Phil could eat meat of any kind all day long.  And, somehow, she managed to bring over multiple dishes that satisfied both parties.  We tried to return the favour, offering her freshly baked goods and cups of tea at every "visit", but she refused to accept.  Even that one day where she showed up soaking wet from a spontaneous rain storm, she would not allow me to make her a tea or give her some clean, dry clothes to wear.  The very odd time, though, she would accept chocolates.  I suppose chocolates really are the way to every girl's heart!     

Her title as our "cleaning lady" slowly transitioned to one of our very good friends.  She was always there for us, 100%.  When we needed paintings framed, she got them framed.  When we needed pants hemmed, she took them home and did it herself.  When my classroom nanny was cleaning my room with strong chemicals while I was pregnant with Nory, she told her she better smarten up.  When we needed a reliable, loving nanny for our daughter, she found us the best nanny in the world (who happened to be one of her dear friends).  When we had our very first baby, she showed up to the house with gifts that were beyond her means.  When Nory turned one, she brought Nory her very first pair of earrings in a heart-shaped box (also, no doubt, above and beyond her means).  We did our best to give back in return, sending her home with different clothes, extra dishes, and other odds and sods we didn't need around the house.  Do you want to know what she did with these items?  She gave them to others in need, whether here in Kuwait or back home in Sri Lanka.  Her heart is more marvelous than you could ever imagine... 

Shani is now considered a valued member of our Kuwait family.  We really look forward to the days she comes over, and not just because it means a spotless house upon her departure!  There's something about her that makes us feel relaxed and joyful whenever she is around.  Maybe it's because she maintains a genuine smile throughout her 15 hour work days  - without so much as a single complaint as to how tired she must be feeling.  Maybe it's the way she inspires us to appreciate our blessings and to seriously consider the things we choose to complain about each and every day.  Whatever it is, it lingers around our house once she leaves and we try to keep it around for as long as possible until our next "Shani fix".  That's not to say we haven't had our fair share of heart-breaking moments together, too.  There were times that Shani would come over, give me a hug and burst into tears.  I would comfort her as best as I knew how.  There were times that she would come over, give me a hug, and I would burst into tears.  She would comfort me better than I would have ever known how.  She is the best.  THE BEST, BEST.  

The last bit of quality time we had together was last Tuesday.  She came over after school and, as usual, I offered her the tea and snack that she routinely declined.  She began her time with us as she always does: by playing, holding, hugging, giggling, oohing and awing over Nory.  The two of them adore each other, with Shani being one of very few people to have received an honest-to-goodness, non-requested hug from Nory.  That their relationship is special is no secret, either.  Kumari has shared with Shani that Nory has never ONCE given her a hug, and that she longed for the connection that Nory and Shani had together...

When Shani left our house on Tuesday night, I gave her some money and a big hug like I always do.  I told her that I love her and to get home safe and that I will see her next week, like I always do.  But now, I'm not sure if that will happen.  I'm not sure we will have Shani to our house ever again.  I'm not sure Nory will get the chance to run and hug her as she walks in the door ever again.  I'm not sure I will ever get to offer her a tea only to be rejected ever again.  I'm not sure if she will even be alive come Tuesday...

Turns out Shani has two massive blood clots in her lungs.  She passed out while changing a 2 year old at work yesterday and went without oxygen for a very long time before the ambulance arrived.  We, along with many others in our Kuwait family, rushed to the hospital and waited together outside the emergency room, hoping for the best but being told to prepare for the very worst.  Shani has severe and irreversible brain damage and the next 48 hours have been deemed as critical ones. 

To say we are heartbroken is an understatement.  Our Kuwait family is absolutely crushed.  I think that many of us are in denial about the whole thing.  She's only 43.  How could this have happened?  She's got three kids back home.  How could this have happened?  She's the nicest soul we've ever met.  How could this have happened?  And why don't these things happen to bad people?  And do miracles truly exist?  And doesn't she deserve one of those?  And hasn't she earned one of those through all of her love and hardwork?

As we pray for Shani and her family through all of our tears, I am confident that she can feel it.  Yet, at the same time, I can tell that she's worried about us instead of herself and that she wants us to be happy again.  I know this because, for the first time ever, Nory gave Kumari the greatest, most genuine hug this morning - at a moment when she needed it most....

We love you, Shani.  You are important to us.  YOU MATTER.  And we will never, ever forget the lessons you've taught us by simply being yourself.

XOXO

Nory Selfies.

The number of iPhones our daughter has been allowed to play with at basketball games, the mall, the grocery store, etc. is UNTHINKABLE.  And I'm not referring to the iPhones that family and friends have allowed her to play with under their own extra-attentive supervision.  I'm talking about the iPhones of some very generous students and strangers who've given Nory their jazzed up mobiles without a single worry of screen shattering, case chipping, or overall phone malfunctioning.  It's truly unbelievable.  I remember being at basketball games throughout the season where Nory was spotted running around with, stepping all over, or throwing into the bleachers three or four iPhones at a time.  It always made me rush to the scene in a flurry (to put an end to it all!), but the iPhone owners were always so INSISTENT that Nory continued to play and - truth be told - I know better than to refuse a kind gesture in this country!  (Thank you Dear Students and Strangers!) 

Anyways, I suppose it's 2014 and we're best to GET WITH THE PROGRAM anyhow.  Nory can disable my iPhone in an instant (how do you even do that?!) and is able to get Siri to say "good afternoon, Phillip" in another, unexplained step.  I don't understand how my "lock" feature still allows her to manipulate so much, but I'm sorta glad it does because I wouldn't have ended up with beauties like these ones otherwise:

That's my give-me-back-my-phone face.  Do you have one of those?  Also, how does she know more about my iPhone than me?  I had NO CLUE you could change the filter BEFORE taking a picture.

I have to admit that I find this one very artistic!  Great job, Eleanor!

One with the both of us. XO

I promise to pack that "rush to the scene in a flurry" feeling in my summer suitcase - just in case you show up at our door with an iPhone.   I DO realize that some of you may not demonstrate the same "keep-on-playing-Nory!" insistence as the people we encounter here in Kuwait. 

Speaking of coming home, that's SOON!  It is NEXT MONTH and we CANNOT WAIT!!!!!!!!!

#mamarazzi

I'm going to add this one to the ranks of "if you were here for tea".  Get ready for some more #mamarazzi's in the near future.  I'm never without my phone.  And if I can help it, I'm never without MY GIRL!

I love the COS dress she was wearing today.  A big thank you to Scot and Maria for that!!!  XO

I think that....

...it's just me having an emotional hangover from last night's festivities.

Wait.

That's a lie. 

I LEGITIMATELY have this love-hate thing with feeding Nory and it exists with or without a so-called "emotional hangover".....

So this afternoon, while Phil was at ball, I went against his "SANITY-SAVING" rules and Googled something along the lines of "feeding a 14 month old".  (Side note:  this ban was implemented after countless eruptions of tears, instigated by the feeling of "not being a good enough mom").  The good news is that rather than finding websites that described babies of Nory's age eating every morsel of a full-fledged steak or pork chop (which would have SURELY triggered the waterworks), I found THIS:

I suppose it still triggered the waterworks (I was crying by the end of sentence #3), but they were tears of RELIEF rather than tears of WORST-MAMA-TO-EXIST!  I was so happy to learn that it's NOT just me and that this whole stand-on-one-foot-while-singing-a-song-and-twirling-a-baton-and-trying-to-feed-my-mover-and-shaker-of-a-child thing is simply par for the course.  Some days Nory eats like a professional athlete and loves EVERY SINGLE THING you put in front of her.  Other days, she eats PEANUTS (not literally) and refuses to swallow the exact same thing she gobbled up the previous breakfast, lunch or dinner.  Some days, she just sucks the taste out of whatever's put in front of her and then spits out the part you're supposed to swallow.  Today is one of the latter and I find it so frustrating.  She even tossed a piece of cheese on the floor!  GASP!!!!!!  Her favourite.....no longer?  Anyways, I feel so happy to have stumbled upon this piece of text that has put my mind at ease.  Now I can go back to enjoying the "artwork" of assembling her various snacks/meals for the day (an activity that I genuinely enjoy)...

For real.  I can't wait until I can jazz up her lunchbox with adorable notes and other sweet whatnot's.  It's definitely worth getting up a little extra early for :)

The End of This Chapter.

Tonight we celebrated the last four years of BULLDOGS Basketball at Phil's annual basketball banquet.  You already know how much this program means to our family, so you can imagine the emotions that were involved in such an evening.  

Phil's speech was three pages long and it's the first one he's ever actually typed up.  He usually just flies by the seat of his pants (which he really excels at!), but this time he wanted to make sure everything was said perfectly.  He wanted to mention every player on both the JV and Varsity teams and he wanted to reflect on their progress since day one.  It was an EXCELLENT speech.  He could be a writer, you know.  He COULD do some guest posts on the Pearl Curriculum if he was interested (ah-hem, HONEY?!).

Anyways, before we left for the banquet, Phil asked if he could practice his speech with me.  Obviously I said yes, although I really didn't anticipate the number of tears that followed (or the fact that I would have to go out in public afterwards).  We'd had our tears at the Qatar tournament and it really felt like we were 'over' the whole no-longer-a-bulldog thing.  Ready to move on.  Ready to become OFFICIAL FALCONS.  Alas, hearing the story of his program (and his kids!) from start to finish was so emotional for the both of us.  It took about 40 minutes to get though the entire speech, with many pauses and Nory-do-something-hilarious-please breaks to bring back the composure we'd lost.  I joked that I could no longer make it to the real deal, simply because I didn't think there was any way in HECK that I could hold it together for a round two....

I won't get into all of the details, but Phil did a wonderful job and you could FEEL the love pouring out of all 34 hearts in attendance.  Should you ever question how great you are, Phil Parkinson, please inquire about the small mountain of Kleenex accumulated at our table.  You've transformed the face of BBS basketball from UNDERDOGS to BULLDOGS and we're all cheering you on as you embrace your next coaching assignment (which does indeed begin on Saturday)!

It's time to open our hearts and our family to the Falcons.  The Bulldogs will be missed, but a new beginning is here!  Let's do this!

XOXO

Habits that BOTHER.

While brushing our teeth before work....

Phil:  You loooove NOT squeezing the toothpaste from the bottom.

Lindsay:  So?

Phil:  So you're the worst person to share a tube of toothpaste with.

Lindsay:  Well good morning to you too, Sunshine!

P.S.  Seems he has already forgotten this ( ^ ^ ^ ) wonderful Valentine's Day gift I gave to him.  I mean.......I'm QUITE sure that the onlookers at the grocery store check-out thought I was the BEST tooth-brushing companion around!

I have no idea how days like this one happen.

Ones where we manage to pack Nory the BEST MEALS EVER before work (un-rushed!), get all of our work done at school, fit in a workout on the treadmill after school, make a yummy dinner, play with Nory, bath Nory, read with Nory, blog, shower, make a tea, and still have about an hour of not-falling-asleep-yet-time to relax with each other.  However do they happen?

The days where we feel like THIS - like an accomplished, well-rehearsed, working mom and dad - are SO VERY RARE.  In fact, if you compare today to yesterday.........well, let's just not.

I'm gonna sketch this day into my memory book forever.  Tomorrow has the potential to be another vomit-is-everywhere, broke the lid of the food processor, cut yourself with the food processor kinda day............

Way to go, TEAM!  We rocked April 28th :)

Can you BELIEVE IT?!

*  The other day Nory took a RUNNING SMACK at my face.  I totally thought she was coming in for a hug and was thrown WAY off guard by the incident that has had Phil in stitches ever since.  It didn't seem intentional.  How do I know this?  Because I've been LEGITIMATELY swatted by her before and know what that's all about.

*  I had a science test on Sunday and THIRTEEN of my students were absent.  That is 15% of the students that I teach!!!  I'm certain it's some sort of a school record ;)

*  I took down Nory's "First Birthday" cards on Saturday afternoon.  Two and a half months after the REAL DEAL.  I realize that I have issues.  And they clearly revolve around "letting go".  Ha!

*  Phil's basketball banquet for the BULLDOGS is taking place this Thursday evening.  Want to know when he begins coaching for the FALCONS?  SATURDAY MORNING.  He's the BEST.  The best, best.

*  Mean Girls is celebrating it's TEN YEAR ANNIVERSARY on Wednesday.  TEN YEARS!!!!!  Don't forget to wear pink ;)  In case you don't know what I'm referring to..........

* Last night I made THIS veggie-packed meatloaf and Phil LOVED IT. HE ATE THREE PIECES and returned to the kitchen to retrieve these pieces ALL BY HIMSELF! I'm not sure who was more proud of themselves after dinner...

* Tonight I continued my "new dinner recipes" streak with THESE broccoli cheese patties. They led to ANOTHER WIN for Chef Lindsay! (P.S. I think my love for baking is beginning to tiptoe its way to the cooking world too. Maybe I've spoken too soon.....)