Comments that make you STOP RIGHT THERE.

I recently confessed that we're in the thick of TANTRUM SEASON with Juliet.  One moment I'm admiring her calm, while the next I'm chasing her around the flat, begging her not to smash my eyeglasses on the tile floors.  There is none of this in-between stuff - she's either a complete angel or a total TY-PHOON.  

The other day, after a PARTICULARLY INTERESTING afternoon of parenting, we were riding the elevator in silence until Phil remarked (in fear), "WHAT IF JULIET IS THE BAD ONE?"

To which I exclaimed, "WHAT DO YOU MEAN?!"

To which HE responded, "WHAT IF NORY IS THE GOOD ONE?!"

To which I insisted without an ounce of confidence, "NAHHHH.....NO WAY."

But, YOU GUYS....

WHAT IF....

ALLLLLLLLLLL THIS TIME,

we've been misled?

I've been calling it a "season" (as in, a brief or temporary period of time) and now I'm thinking that ONE SEASON is a thing in some geographical places and

WHAT IF....

ALLLLLLLL THIS TIME,

the wild child is, in fact, Baby #2?

That face.  OY.

Y'all can keep chuckling over there.  

I'm going to embrace the Wild Child's naptime and CHOOSE TO believe in a tantrum SEASON over here in Kuwait.  Where the leaves are not going to change colour.  And the snow isn't going to fall.  

This mom went on a date and now she's my superhero.

***  Note:  You may also enjoy this very post on The Huffington Post.  (Insert jumping up and down HERE!!!)

While doing my usual HuffPo scan yesterday, I learned that one of the world's most beautiful people, Chrissy Teigen, went on a dinner date with her husband.

Pretty normal, right?

Well, the Internet world went crazy about it.  Like, crazy, crazy, MEAN about it.  Reason being, she left her 10 day old baby at home for the outing.

Sigh.

Are these people FOR REAL?!  

I automatically had two thoughts:

1)  Is Chrissy Teigen like me?  Did she have to be ENCOURAGED, CONVINCED, and REMINDED that time away from your kids is a HEALTHY THING?  Did she feel guilty for leaving the house, and more and more guilty with every passing moment?  Did she actually enjoy her food or did feelings of worry take her appetite away?  Did she embrace the child-free conversations with her husband or was she too distracted checking her phone for possible updates from the nanny?

2)  Is Chrissy Teigen unlike me?  Did she get excited while choosing a restaurant for her first date post-baby?  Did she shower and get dressed up with a smile on her face?  Did she giggle throughout dinner and get lost in conversation with her best friend?  Did she peruse the dessert menu and order a tea or a coffee too?  Did she feel like, "YES!  THIS IS JUST WHAT I NEEDED!!!" on the drive back to the house?

If Chrissy is my first thought, LIKE ME, these online critics are making her feel EVEN WORSE than she already does.  And if Chrissy is more like my second thought, UNLIKE ME, she's the person I've been striving to become.

Before this sentence, there were only three people in the world who knew that, since having Juliet, I've been dealing with post-partum anxiety.  The guilt and worry has been a constant battle and I just wish that one day I will wake up and have a little more CHRISSY in me.

Thank you, CHRISSY TEIGEN for going on a date with your husband 10 days post-partum.  In doing that, you've become a Mama I look up to.  

NARRATING the CAMERA ROLL....(the "OTHER THINGS we did while Daddy was in Thailand" edition)...

I told Phil I would try to blog every day while he was at the conference.  He wanted to know what we got up to as a trio and, with the time change and his busy schedule (and the fact that Nory and Jet scream over who gets to talk to Daddy on FaceTime), reading about it on the blog made it so much easier. 

Well.

The documentation online says I gave a valiant effort in the first couple of days, but clearly dropped the ball thereafter.  WHOOPS!!!!!!  It's just that binge-watching Degrassi on Netflix was much more appealing than writing and uploading photos.  Sorry, Babe!

What's MORE WEIRD is that this week was a blur as well.  I didn't see Phil until Tuesday night and with parent-teacher conferences, along with a baby shower hosted at our place, we haven't had much together time to chat.  So, Dearest Phillip, here is the information you've been waiting for........

 ^^^  Uncle Steve came to see us on Friday and Saturday.  One of the first things we did was arts and crafts.  Jettie made a MARKER MASTERPIECE (and didn't even eat the markers this time!) and Nory made some spring flowers :)  They aren't hung up in the house because the girls gave their pictures to Uncle Steve!

^^^  Then we did this thing that you would have REALLY HATED because it was messy.  We put dish soap, water, and food colouring into the blender.  Repeatedly.  So we could fill up the green tub.  The girls had a blast!

^^^  We also made some SNOW outside in the sunshine.  I told Nory it was our April Fool's joke because we were playing a trick on people :)  

 ^^^  We made pizza for dinner and Nory decided to put both tomatoes and onions on hers.  If only you were home, Daddy, to have a piece....ha!!!  While the pizza was in the oven, Nory was acting LOUD and WILD and Juliet thought my hip was the perfect place to be :)

^^^  We did lots of playing outside with friends.  The weather was beautiful and Nory loved being with kids of all ages.  In this picture she is showing off her cone/sidewalk house :)

 ^^^  Em got home from Amsterdam on Saturday and she surprised us with multiple souvenirs!  The girls were happy to snuggle with Auntie and also to resume their Snap Chat game.  I refuse to get Snap Chat, so it's a real novelty whenever Auntie is over :)

^^^  There was also time for Nory to play quietly on her own.  She loves having her dollhouse in the living room and, now, I'm convinced it's the ABSOLUTE BEST PURCHASE we've ever made.  After the Ergo.....

 ^^^  We played in the sandbox lots, too.  Juliet no longer eats the sand and actually refuses to get out when it's time to go.  The girl could stay in this piece of heaven forever!  Nory served me multiple cups of sand tea and I only had a few small fits about sand in our sheets in the middle of the night.  

^^^  It appears as though someone used my phone to take pictures of Mickey Mouse too.  But I'm not sure when that happened.  Or who did it.  

Overall, we had a great time together.  The days were busy, but fun, and the meltdowns were kept down to an age-appropriate amount (a value I made up in my own head).

Glad you're home, Daddy!!!!  We missed you!!!!!!!!!!!! XOXO 

FACT: Our "village" includes an animated character.....

Ever since Netflix came to Kuwait, we've been introduced to a new variety of children's shows.  Shows like Ben and Holly, Bo on the Go, Max and Ruby and Daniel Tiger have become BIG NAME ACTS in our television repertoire.  In fact, some of them (well, ONE OF THEM) is an honest-to-goodness item in our ever-growing "parenting toolbox." 

Not kidding, you guys.

Daniel Tiger is FOR REAL.

The thing is, Daniel Tiger is not just a show.  He's some sort of THREENAGER-WHISPERER that turns every single parenting dilemma that you could possibly think of into a song.  A song that your child loves.  AND believes in.  And I know it sounds freaky, but I PROMISE, PROMISE it's true.

Evidence #1:  Stopping play to go potty

It's every child's nightmare.  One minute you're happily playing toys, and the next your Mom or Dad is dragging you to the potty because you're doing the pee-pee dance.  There's kicking and screaming and it's a big, painful ordeal that leaves everyone annoyed and stressed out. 

Until you learn about Daniel Tiger.

Because there's a song about that:

When you have to go potty
Stop
And go right away
Flush and wash and be on your way

All we have to do is sing the song and Nory goes off to do "all the steps!"  It's . like . MAGIC.

Evidence #2:  Leaving the house without the kids

Kids love to make it seem like you're really, truly abandoning them, don't they?  At least ours do.  It breaks my heart and I always have to wait outside the door until I hear them stop whining and crying.  This allows me to move from HOME MODE to WHEREVER WE ARE GOING MODE, knowing the waterworks are over and everything will be fine. 

But then we learned about Daniel Tiger.  And there's a song for this scenario too.....

Grown-ups come back to you
Grown-ups come back they do
Grown-ups come back

So now, we sing the song and Nory stays calm and tells Juliet, "grown-ups come back, Jettie!"  Our departures have become much, much SMOOTHER.

Evidence #3:  When something goes wrong

There are times when the Nornado comes out and absolutely everything upsets her.  Her milk isn't in the right cup.  Her dress doesn't match her lips (don't ask).  The table has a speck of dirt on it.  It's one thing after another that makes our chance of survival seem rather bleak. 

But, being the threenager-whisperer that he is, Daniel Tiger made a song for this situation too!

When something seems bad
Turn it around
And find something good

Not only does it work with Nory, but she uses it AGAINST US whenever we're frustrated or grouchy.  It's hysterical. 

To summarize the evidence I've presented in this morning's post:

"Tell me everything, Daniel...."

So now you know that we don't just have a nanny.  We also have a big cat helping us to raise our children.  Haaaaaaaa.  It takes a village, you guys.  And we've now introduced an animated character into the line-up :)

WE LOVE YOU, DANIEL TIGER!!!!!!!!!!!!

Here's a visual of what we come home to every day.

You respect us A LOT more now, don't you?

This is what "pushing the boundaries" looks like in picture form...

1)  A child comes up with an idea.  The parent puts an end to the idea because of it's potentially dangerous and/or destructive side effects. 

2)  The child is inspired to perform their idea in an alternative space, reestablishing their initial desire.

3)  The child decides to go halfsies on their idea.  It's not completely what they pictured, but could be assumed as acceptable to their well-meaning guardian.

4)  The halfsies idea is a no-go.  Both parties attempt to reason with each other. 

5)  The adult returns from a brief second of distraction to discover a child beaming with pride - their feat accomplished, their calculations BANG-ON. 

6)  The adult hides any ounce of amusement and gives the child a look of disapproval.  The child decides to cover their face, well aware of its 100% success rate during hide and seek with Mom and Dad. 

So, friends.  How was your day?

The Darndest Things, Indeed!

Thank you to all of you kind, kind people who continuously tell me how "awesome" I look.  Or ask me with a somewhat serious face, "how did you lose the baby weight so quickly?!"  Or make the comment of all comments, "WAIT - you had a kid lately?" 

THANK YOU. 

Because whether you're being totally honest or not, I usually leave your presence feeling pretty good about my post-baby-body.  Especially when I see a string of you day-makers in sequence!  Your compliments band together and make me feel as though I REALLY COULD fit in with T. Swift's Bad Blood crew.  Or - even more extreme - throw on a bikini and surprise my family with an "I'm coming swimming in the freezing cold pool too!"  (The latter never, hardly EVER happens).

Pool selfie! :)

Alas, there's nothing like family when it comes to keepin' it real. 

Example:  When you're in your bikini.  Ready to take on the world of public swimming.  And your toddler pokes your stomach and says with a smile, "Mommy!  Your tummy's squishy!!!!"  (Before you even step foot outside the apartment). 

This, my friends, is as real as it gets! 

So. 

A big thank you to Nory for being my everyday reality check ;)  A few things to keep in mind:

1)  Mommy's tummy IS squishy, you're right.  In fact, it might even be squishy-ish forever.  But the trade-off (YOU AND JULIET!) is definitely worth it :)

2)  When it comes to people that aren't your family, please don't ever poke their tummies and comment on their squishy-ness!

3)  If I don't swim with you again, it's a matter of core values.  As in, swimming in cold water is flat-out WRONG.

4)  I hope that Taylor Swift still exists when you're concert age.  And that you like her.  Because that would be one of our best day's ever :)

I've learned something recently.

And among other things, the lesson I learned is this:

There's a fine line between

thanking a toddler to encourage the repetition of a helpful task in the future

and 

thanking a toddler to encourage the repetition of a helpful task IN THAT VERY MOMENT, ultimately making the helpful task an unhelpful one.

I'm not even sure if I've phrased this right, so let me give you an example of what I'm talking about:

Example:  Toddler assisting with younger sibling's diaper change.

Me:  Nory, could you please get a diaper from the drawer for sister?

Nory:  (retrieves diaper) Here you go, Mommy!!!

Me:  (super happily) Thank you so much, Nory!  You're such a big help!

Nory:  (continues to retrieve diaper after diaper from the drawer, placing them on the bed where I'm changing Juliet)  Here you go!  Here you go!  Here you go!  Here you go! (with the utmost enthusiasm)

You see, in this instance, a task that was initially deemed as a helpful one (ah-hem, retrieving ONE DIAPER), was turned into a completely UNHELPFUL one, because in addition to having one fresh and clean baby, we also had a pile of unnecessary diapers on our bed that needed to be put away.

 
So here's my point:  Was my thank you too much?  Should I have taken out the "so"?  Should I have cut it after sentence number one?  Should I have responded to her assistance with "thank you" - full stop?  Or should I have laughed at the mountain of diapers beside me and bank on the magic of the "clean-up song" (and My Toddler, Cooperative Edition) to set things straight? 

I chose the latter option.  With a side of reflection. With a plan to, MOVING FORWARD, use a level of expression and word choice that takes the whole "YOU ARE THE BEST CHILD IN THE ENTIRE WORLD FOR GETTING ME A DIAPER" out of the equation.  Unless I'm super exhausted.  And she's acting like a Nornado.  And I REALLY, REALLY, REALLY need to get her back on MY SIDE to survive the rest of the day.  

Ha!  Fine lines, tight-rope walking and survival.  Living and learning over here ;)

The Longest Week. Maybe, EVER.

Last Saturday morning, Phil took both girls to the doctor's office - one for a check-up (Juliet) and one for a "what the heck is this rash?" appointment (Eleanor).  Both visits went well and Phil left the office with a two thumbs up for Jet's growth and development (woot!), a bottle of cream for Nory's rash (which is gone now, yet still a mystery), and the hilarious memory of the doctor exclaiming, "Nory is ONLY in the 90th percentile for weight now!"  Haha.  Nory has been in the 95th percentile for the longest time, but it seems that the elimination of naps (ah-hem TWO EXTRA HOURS OF NON-STOP ACTIVITY PER DAY) is burning even more calories.  What can we say?  The Nornado is a force!!!

As close as possible, ALWAYS. 

Anyways, on Sunday Jet needed to go for her four month vaccinations.  We know she's already five months old, but vaccinations come with a spacing issue and we can thank our wonderful pal REFLUX for screwing up the schedule.  Good thing the four month vaccinations are our favourite. 

Except for that I'm lying.

We knew from prior experience that THIS PARTICULAR SET OF VACCINATIONS equates to unhappiness and exhaustion. 

Heart-breaking :(

The thing is, Juliet was ALREADY teething (and uncomfortable!) pre-vaccination.  Her bottom gums have been inflamed for the past two weeks and she's been A TOUCH warm here and there.  So it didn't help that we added to the teething experience by introducing achy legs and an honest-to-goodness fever via two big jabs.  Consequently, we pulled an all-nighter on Sunday night (party!!!!) and then did it again on Monday night (wooooo!!!!).  Jet wanted to be held - and moving - ALL NIGHT LONG.  Which I suppose is superior to a full-fledged tear fest all night long.  Yes, yes it IS.  Our Darling Girl remained her quiet self, just uncomfortable and in need of Mommy and Daddy cuddles :) 

On Tuesday night, with the fever STILL THERE and the appearance of a stuffy nose and coughing, we were advised to head to the clinic.  Phil and Juliet headed out around midnight - in the lightning and hail storm! - while I waited around anxiously at home.  The verdict?  A TRIPLE WHAMMY!  Teething, Post-Vaccination Blah-ness, and a Respiratory Infection!  The doctor said to continue the medicine for fever and to bring her back on Thursday if the fever continued.

On Wednesday, Jet was coughing and stuffy but the fever was starting to go down.  We sorta slept on Wednesday night (HOORAY!) and were thrilled to come home on Thursday to find out that Juliet remained fever-less ALL DAY LONG!!!!  YIPPEEE-YA-HOOO!  We smiled at the thought of a good night's rest and a return to SANITY. 

Our after school photo from yesterday.  LET THE SLEEP-DEPT-OPTIMISM shine through!!!!

On the mend.  Or so we thought!

Then Thursday night happened.  And not only did Jet's fever return with OOMPH, Nory's temperature had skyrocketed and we awoke (I mean, if we were ever sleeping) to two really sick babies.  Which is why we packed up the kids and spent the morning at the hospital.

The downsides of CLOSENESS!  Germ-sharing!!!!!

Still in her Princess Sofia night dress and cat slippers.  The girl continues to maintain quality speed when she's sick!

K-POP joined us for a while.  You can tell that Juliet is the BEST BABY EVER because she was so smiley and happy despite the bloodwork contraption they kept taped to her foot.  BRAVE!

We were at the hospital from eight until noon and are still waiting on test results.  The doctor told us that there have been many kids coming in with an awful virus, so there's a chance it's just that.  However - with Juliet - they are being a little more cautious due to her extended fever and premature status (p.s. will she ever lose that?).  Let's hope whatever it is goes away ASAP.  

Sigh.  At least there's not a jumpy castle/slide available for the kids in the courtyard today.  And at least report cards aren't due on Sunday.  And at least exams aren't due at the end of this week.  HAAAAAA!!!!!!!!  ;)

One day Phil and I will get to sleep like these two did on the way home from the hospital: 

Until then, let's not mistake FEVERISH BABIES for BABY FEVER.  Completely, totally, ABSOLUTELY on opposite ends of the spectrum.  We've got our hands full with TWO!

Spring Break (!)

Let's talk about this title.  More specifically, let's talk about that exclamation point that's caged up in brackets.  Because it's a blog first, people!  For the girl who OVER-uses the exclamation point to confine one of those happy line-with-a-dot's in the very title of her long overdue blog post, it's never before seen.  And the reasoning is this:  this is Spring Break (the End of Maternity Leave Edition) as opposed to Spring Break (the End of A VERY LONG Third Quarter Edition).  The difference is HUGE.

Normally, this week would be the best week ever (if you're a teacher, you know!), but I feel like I'm going through some serious mourning period and the whole pizazz of the holiday isn't quite there (if you're a mom, you might know!).  In fact, I've been so upset about returning to work that I haven't really wanted to come around here and talk about what we've been up to.  I felt like sharing our family adventures was akin to tossing a big fat lie into the virtual world, with the underlying theme being heartbreak.

Sigh.

I mean, WE HAVE HAD a glorious time thus far.  WE HAVE.  But, I've had some not-so-glorious moments on my own and it's been difficult trying to keep it together in front of the girls each day.  If only brackets worked on tears.  (TEARS).  Yep, definitely don't have the effect I was hoping for. 

There have been people that have been able to snap me out of it (briefly).  Like Nory and Jet, who have taken the playful approach.  Or Phil, who has taken the MOST SUPPORTIVE HUSBAND EVER approach.  Or Kumari, who has taken the CLEAR AS DAY approach by telling me "no work, no money, Madam".  Gotcha.  When the lady who left her child in ANOTHER country to earn a better living for him has to give advice to the lady who leaves her children for merely ten hours a day........the point is made rather effortlessly.

I start Sunday.

Moving on......

I am writing to you tonight because Courtney and Phil are watching some lame movie that had a typewriter in its opening scene and - according to my long list of movie-viewing rules - I don't view movies that feature typewriters.  So, rather than pretend to enjoy "The Imitation Game" (Oscar movie, ya, ya, whatever), I decided The Pearl Curriculum would be a better time investment ;)

Back to Spring Break (!).  Since I've been on unpaid leave for the last two months, we decided to save our money and have a Kuwaiti stay-cation.  We've taken it upon ourselves to do all things BEACH and discovered on Monday that we could get a week-long pass at the Hilton Resort for a great price!  It's only five minutes away from our house and we've been going to and from ever since.  Nory's especially in heaven and - because we get to come home for naps and sleep in our own bed at night - we've been in heaven too!

Time to end this post with the greatest exclamation points of all, Juliet and Eleanor!  (ELEANOR).  Hmmm.....can't cage that one in either.  But it was worth a try ;)

Her first swim!!!!!

A recently-discovered, jumping-picture PRO!

Life's a beach. And so's our house. (Worst parenting decision EVER).

Nory has a water/sand table that we used for water play a while back, but it has since been sitting in the corner of her bathroom, collecting dust and taking up space.  I mean, I suppose it served as a shelf for her plethora of bath toys, but it wasn't being used as intended and so we decided to re-implement the beauty back into our play rotation.  It all started with a trip to the Avenues (sigh, The Avenues - where dreams come true!).

Here is a picture of Phil hauling three bags of sand through the mall, to the parking garage:

Two things are funny about this:

1)  We didn't get a porter.  Which threw every onlooker for a loop.  But it's not like it was heavy and it's not like we had small children in tow ;)

2)  Yes, we live in the desert.  And yes, we VISA-ed our sand.  If you lived here, you'd understand.  (I think).

Anyways, embarrassments aside, the sand arrived home and our worst parenting decision ever was born.  Ah-hem, the embarrassment continues....

Rather than keep the sand table in the bathroom (where we can easily clean up messes compliments of the bathroom hose and the drainage holes in the floor)........rather than put the sand in the hallway outside (which could also be easily swept up and maintained)........we decided to (GET THIS!) put the sand table by her arts and crafts station - INSIDE OUR HOUSE.  Because, you know, we will just tell our two year old to keep the sand IN the sand table.  Because if she can count to eleven and name off shapes and colours, then SURELY she will understand that sand stays with sand.  IN THE TABLE. 

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!

And I can't blame exhaustion.  Or a lack of concentration.  Or anything that would make me sound like less of a parenting amateur than I already am.  This KEEP-THE-SANDBOX-INSIDE decision?  It was ALL ME.  All "fully awake, well thought out, made with zero pressure/bribery/game of truth or dare" ME.  And even my husband was in agreement.  There was no hesitation or concern from his end, which is completely bizarre because that man likes a clean house like nobody else I know. 

Back to the title of this post. 

There is sand EVERYWHERE IN OUR FLAT!  Not only because every pour, every dig, and every big archeological find resulted in sand flying around the general vicinity of the table.  But because Nory is Little Miss Sweaty McGee and, despite the sand-wiping-off technique we repeatedly modeled, sand sticks to her like glue and her hands served as sand delivery vehicles that whipped through our place in seconds.  Which is why I found myself brushing sand out from under my covers at one in the morning last night.  (Thank goodness our child - who LOVES TO SWEEP - is 100% anti-pile). 

The moral of this story is:  don't put a sand table in your house.  

#parentingfail

If You Give a Desert Girl a Puddle. And Dinosaurs.

Nory woke up on the wrong side of the bed Saturday morning. THE COMPLETELY WRONG SIDE OF THE BED.  It was one of those mornings where dropping a piece of playdoh on the floor was the BE ALL END ALL.  Of LIFE.  #fullfledgedtoddler

This is why the thunderstorm that happened during the night was a bigger blessing than usual.  Rain on any day has a certain pizazz to it around here, but pond-size puddles on a day where my patience is already running low after 27 "she's awake" minutes?  Either I have great karma or God was looking out for all of us ;)  THANK YOU HIGHER POWERS!

So, while Phil was off to the pediatrician with Juliet, I took Nory down to the courtyard to play in the water.  It was MY BEST IDEA TO DATE.  The only yelling consisted of "AGAIN! AGAIN!!!!!" and the only time spent flailing around on the ground was a result of her passionate attempts at the sport of swimming.  YES, her shoes are still soaked.  And YES, she might have had a meltdown when I told her it was time to go home.  But I still see it as a WIN.  During those glorious 30 or so minutes, Nory's tear ducts took a break and my patience revived itself.  Totally necessary repairs given the continuation of the day she woke up on the wrong side of the bed.  

We found ourselves at the dinosaur park later that afternoon.  HAAAA!!!!  This moved us one more distraction closer to bedtime!  Nory's been on a big dinosaur kick lately and it just so happened Kuwait opened a dino park to meet her dinosaur-viewing needs.  I repeat, either I have great karma or God was looking out for all of us ;)

Although scared at times, she had a great time.  She kept commenting on how "cute" the dinosaurs were.  And how she wanted to hold them.  And how she wanted to feed them.  And how she wanted to ride them.  Except for when given the chance to ride one, she backed out and decided that watching other kids ride them was a better idea. 

As she did with the kite festival, she keeps asking to see the pictures of our outing and to return for more dino park fun.  If the park allows Nory and I in for free again, we just might do it ;) 

The moral of this story is.....distractions rule.  We survived a tough day with a toddler.  You can too.  Chocolate works wonders.  And.......pray for us.